Election Day

And I can't sleep. Damn.

This is the first national election where I've voted for the candidate I like rather than against the guy I hated. I really liked Mondale in 1984, but even more so I thought that we had to Stop Reagan. I'm still shocked that Reagan has become a hero in retrospect - as if AIDS, third-world death squads, and the willful destruction of our inner cities never happened. The Democratic Machine picked Dukakis for us in 1988 and Kerry in 2000, and neither thrilled me but whatever. I voted for them if only to stop the Bush's. And though I voted for Gore, of course, I didn't really care - I had no idea how hideously right-wing Bush Jr. would turn out to be.

I was overseas and never got my ballot for Clinton in 1992; we only got the news every two months so I pretty much missed that one. And I left my ballot blank in 1996; I refused to vote for that backstabbing shit who sold gays, blacks, and everyone else down the river rather than take a stand on anything.

So. 2008. I'm 42, and for the first time I really, really like a candidate. Sure I have issues with Obama - I'm not starry eyed and dreamy - but there's something there. He'll smash through the ebony ceiling and that means a lot to me, but it's more than that. It's like this: I could've known this guy. I don't, but I know people like him, intellectual community activists who held faith in an ugly world. And I'm just amazed that someone from this crowd, my ideal crowd, is set to lead the country.

14 or so more hours and we'll know. My country might finally do the right thing.